Whew!

Wow, it's been a crazy time around here. I can't believe I spent this long not posting here, but it was necessary. Once things started getting back on track after Gabe's bout with croup, we got hit with another wave of ickyness. We are beginning to get over it now, whatever it was, but it's still affecting me quite a bit. I have been really tired and not feeling myself at all and that part of it is hanging on. I'm thankful though that when we do get sick, which isn't all that often, we bounce back fairly quickly. I attribute that to our diet and basically taking good overall care of ourselves. It does make a difference. I will apologize in advance if any of this post doesn't make much sense. I'm still a little foggy, lol.

Tomorrow marks the end of term 2 in my Bible college class and term 3 begins next week. I'm loving every minute of it. I'm learning so much and making some great friends, and of course strengthening my relationship with God. I can't believe how far I was from Him just a short time ago, and now I'm closer than I've ever been. I've been able to accomplish so many things through Him and with His guidance, it's amazing. Truly amazing. I look back on the last year and I was just a mess, especially after ending the relationship with my ex. I didn't realize how co-dependent I had become on my ex until I left. The first time I had to go to a grocery store alone with the kids was absolutely terrifying for me. I was even scared to drive. I was so far removed from myself during that 7 year relationship that I spent much of my time at home, in solitude with my children. I didn't want to see or talk to anyone in the real world. I became so insanely shy, even talking to a bank teller or cashier was excruciating for me and affected me for days afterward. I would never go places or do things on my own. Ever. I always had to have someone with me, and that was on the rare occasion that I left the house. My life was in shambles. I wouldn't go to church because 1) I had to do it alone, and 2) I was horribly ashamed of my life, so I just didn't go. I look at my life now and I'm such a different person. I'm out, getting a life that I never had but always wanted. I'm meeting people, learning new things, making HUGE changes and stepping out of my comfort zone time and time again. Fear still grips me in almost everything that I do, but I press through it. I lived in fear for far too long and I won't let it have control over me anymore. It still has a voice, true, but not control. I've even started the process of auditioning for the worship team (singing) at my church. I've always wanted to sing but never had the confidence. This is a different girl!! I know none of this would have been possible without the strength of God in me.

I've recently decided to hold off on my studio re-do and I've contacted a homestay organization in the hopes of hosting a foreign student. Not only will this help my finances (things are VERY tight!) but I think it would be a great experience for the kids. I had an interview with one organization in particular and hopefully I will hear something from them soon. I figure since I already do so much of my crafting at my kitchen table, why not use my office for something that will be of a great help. I'm working on making some more changes in the areas of finances, meal/menu planning and smart shopping. So far I've managed to cut my grocery bill from around $500 a month to around $350 a month, but I know I can do better than that so I' m working on it. I will post about these changes soon, as they happen.

A few weeks back I watched the movie Julie & Julia and was completely inspired to do more cooking and baking. I have such a strong desire to make things from scratch, bake treats with the kids and create meals that make those who eat them close their eyes in pure enjoyment. I love how great meals bring people together and represent wonderful family moments and gatherings. I love how home-made baked treats make children eagerly sit in front of the oven licking their lips, and make them silently giggle while they eat them, filling up with the love that the baker put into them. I have a lot of wonderful memories of family meals and I want to experience those with my own children. It may take me awhile to start this "new" tradition here but I will keep you posted on every moment of it.

So that's it for now. I'm tired and should get some much needed rest. The kids and I were up at 5am this morning as I am helping out at my church every Sunday for the month of March. A bunch of us are making breakfast for the early morning service team and then we all sit down and eat together before service begins. It's such a lovely time, but it makes for a very tired Me come Sunday afternoon. I'm not a morning person at all. I'm not a grump, it just affects me a lot physically when I wake up too early.

Goodnight everyone! Bye for now ♥